Mencius
lost his father at an early period, but in his youthful years he enjoyed the
lessons of his kind mother, who thrice changed her residence on his account.
At
first they lived near a cemetery, and Mencius amused himself with acting the
various scenes which he witnessed at the tombs, “this” said the lady, “is no
place for my son;” and she removed to a house in the market-place. But the
change was no improvement. The boy took to playing the part of a salesman,
vaunting his wares, and chaffering with customers. His mother sought a new
house, and found one at last close by a public school. There her child's
attention was taken with the various exercises of politeness which the scholars
were taught, and he endeavoured to imitate them. The mother was satisfied. “This”
she said, “is the proper place for my son."
When
they lived in the market-place, near their house was a pig-butcher's. One day
Mencius asked his mother what they were killing the pigs for, and was told that
it was to feed him. Her conscience immediately reproved her for the answer. She
said to herself, "While I was carrying this boy in my womb, I would not
sit down if the mat was not placed square, and I ate no meat which was not cut
properly; so I taught him when he was yet unborn. And now when his intelligence
is opening, I am deceiving him; this is to teach him untruthfulness! “With this
she went and bought a piece of pork in order to make good her words.
As
Mencius grew up, he was sent to school. When he returned home one day, his
mother looked up from the web which she was weaving, and asked him how far he
had got on. He answered her with an air of indifference that he was doing well
enough, on which she took a knife and cut the thread of her shuttle. The idler
was alarmed, and asked what she meant, when she gave him a long lecture,
showing that she had done what he was doing, that her cutting her thread was
like his neglecting his learning. The admonition, it is said, had its proper
effect; the lecture did not need to be repeated.
Once
Mencius wife was squatting down one day in her own room, when Mencius went in.
He was so much offended at finding her in that position, that he told his
mother, and expressed his intention to put her away, because of “her want of
propriety." “It is you who have no propriety," said his mother, “and
not your wife. Do not ‘The Rules of Propriety' say, 'When you are about to
ascend a hall, raise your voice; when you enter a door, keep your eyes low? ‘The
reason of the rules is that people may not be taken unprepared; but you entered
the door of your private apartment without raising your voice, and so caused
your wife to be caught squatting on the ground. The impropriety is with you and
not with her." On this Mencius fell to reproving himself, and did not dare
to put away his wife.
One
day, when he was living with his mother in Ts'e, she was struck with the
sorrowfulness of his aspect, as he stood leaning against a pillar, and asked
him the cause of it. He replied, “I have heard that the superior man occupies
the place for which he is adapted, accepting no reward to which he does not
feel entitled, and not covetous of honour and emolument. Now my doctrines are
not practised in Ts‘e: I wish to leave it, but I think of your old age, and am
anxious." His mother said, “It does not belong to a woman to determine
anything of herself, but she is subject to the rule of the three obediences. When
young, she has to obey her parents; when married, she has to obey her husband;
when a widow, she has to obey her son. You are a man in your full maturity, and
I am old. Do you act as your conviction of righteousness tells you ought to do,
and I will act according to the rule which belongs to me? Why should you be
anxious about me? "
Such
are the accounts of the mother of Mencius. She was a woman of very superior
character, and that her son's subsequent distinction was in a great degree
owing to her influence and training,
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